Issue 10 – Week beginning May 31st

Tittle Tattle Newsletter 

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Sponsored by Harden Congregational Church

Issue10. Week beginning 31st May photo featuring Fountains Abbey

One Step At A Time

One more step along the world I go

One more step along the world I go

From the old things to the new

Keep me travelling along with you.

Round the corners of the world I turn

More and more about the world I learn

And the new things that I see

You’ll be looking at along with me.

As I travel through the bad and good

Keep me travelling the way I should

Where I see no way to go

You’ll be telling me the way I know.

Give me courage when the world is rough

Keep me loving though the world is tough

Leap and sing in all I do

Keep me travelling along with you.

You are older than the world can be

You are younger than the life in me

Ever old and ever new

Keep me travelling along with you.

This children’s song always used to come to mind when my grandchildren, as toddlers, were taking their first faltering steps. They took the first two or three steps and then overbalanced and fell over. With a bit of encouragement, loving hands to help and a real determination, they would totter forward taking more and more steps to that welcoming sofa. Next thing I knew, they were running about!

It feels a little bit like that at the moment with the Government’s message to us all – one step at a time. No doubt we will sometimes  ‘fall over’ or be thinking we are never going to get there, out of this crisis. But with the encouragement of each other, our fellow travellers and the guidance from the God who holds us in his hands, I believe we will come to a point when we can run again [some of us more than others!]

‘Do not fear, for I am with you, do not be afraid, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my victorious right hand.’

[Isaiah 41:10]

Good Advice?

There are a lot of people out there who are full of advice for us, especially at the moment. Here’s some good advice to consider when you are listening to it.

  • ‘It’s useless to hold a person to anything he says while he is in love, drunk or running for office.’

[Shirley MacLaine]

  • Consult means to seek another’s approval of a course already decided upon.

[Ambrose Bierce]

  • ‘Always be sincere even if you don’t mean it.’

[Harry S. Truman]

  • ‘The time for action is past. Now is the time for senseless bickering.’

[Ashleigh Brilliant]

  • And finally, don’t take instructions too literally. There are an awful lot of signs around giving advice on how to act safely, in train stations and other public places.

‘I got to the Underground and saw this sign ‘Dogs must be carried on the escalators.’  It took me nearly 40 minutes to find one!’  {Harry Worth]

Headlines 

And beware those misleading headlines:-

  • ‘SOMETHING WENT WRONG IN JET PLANE CRASH EXPERTS SAY’
  • ‘DRUNK GETS NINE MONTHS IN VIOLIN CASE’
  • POLICE HELP DOG BITE VICTIM’
  • STOLEN PAINTING FOUND BY TREE’
  • NEW VACCINE MAY CONTAIN RABIES’
  • ‘KIDS MAKE NUTRICIOUS SNACKS’

Harden Hub

The Hub, based at the Congregational Church, is continuing to distribute fresh produce to households in the village.

Any enquiries about this to Helen Keighley, Minister, at the Congregational Church.

hardencongs@gmail.com 

or phone Helen on 07932 156337. 

Village Undertakers Wilsden  Coronavirus update

As lockdown begins to ease Bradford Council have informed us that there will be a number of changes next week at the Districts’ crematoria. Currently services are held outside but from June 8th up to ten mourners will be permitted to enter the crematorium chapel for services and a further ten may meet outside. Social distancing must be maintained at all times and chairs are not to be moved from where they have been located.

To help reduce the chance of contamination, once the coffin has been placed on the catafalque, barriers will be put in front to prevent anyone touching the coffin. Family bearers will not be permitted to carry the coffin into the crematorium.

To allow for sanitising the chapel between funerals, services will be strictly limited to twenty minutes. Music will be restricted to two pieces only. Hand sanitisers will be available at both entry and exit points of the buildings.

For burials at the District’s cemeteries the number of mourners permitted increases from ten to twenty.

“Direct Cremations” from June 8th will return to their normal pattern; see our website for details at www.villageundertakers.co.uk and choose the “Penyghent” option under “Prices”. As usual we remain open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. 

Ring Robert Waddington on 07599 46 26 49

The Gardens of England……..

The Glory of the Garden

Our England is a garden that is full of stately views,

Of borders, beds and shrubberies and lawns and avenues,

With statues on the terraces and peacocks strutting by;

But the Glory of the Garden lies in more than meets the eye.

For where the old thick laurel grow, along the thin red wall,

You find the tool and potting sheds which are the heart of all;

The cold-frames and the hot-houses, the dungpits and the tanks,

The rollers, carts and drain pipes, with the barrows and the planks.

And there you’ll see the gardeners, the men and ‘prentice boys

Told off to do as they are bid and do it without noise;

For, except when seeds are planted and we shout to scare the birds,

The Glory of the Garden it abideth not in words.

And some can pot begonias and some can bud a rose,

And some are hardly fit to trust with anything that grows;

But they can roll and trim the lawns and sift the sand and loam,

For the Glory of the Garden occupieth all who come.

Our England is a garden, and such gardens are not made

By singing:- ‘Oh how beautiful!’ and sitting in the shade,

While better men than we go out and start their working lives

At grubbing weeds from gravel-paths with broken dinner-knives.

There’s not a pair of legs so thin, there’s not a head so thick,

There’s not a hand so weak and white, nor yet a heart so sick,

But it can find some useful job that’s crying to be done,

For the Glory of the Garden glorifieth everyone.

Then seek your job with thankfulness and work till further orders,

If it’s only netting strawberries or killing slugs in borders;

And when your back stops aching and your hands begin to harden,

You will find yourself a partner in the Glory of the Garden.

Oh, Adam was a gardener, and God who made him sees

That half a proper gardener’s work is done upon his knees,

So when your work is finished, you can wash your hands and pray

For the Glory of the Garden, that it may not pass away!

And the Glory of the Garden it shall never pass away!

[Rudyard Kipling]

Things aren’t always as they seem………..

[A story from Margaret]

A man is dying in hospital. He has his family around him – his wife, a daughter and two sons and a nurse. With his last breath he says

“All my properties in Cullingworth and Denholme I leave to my eldest  son. All my properties in Bingley I leave to my daughter. All my properties in the City Centre I leave to my youngest son and to my wife, everything else.”

He then passes away.

The nurse comforts his family and says to his wife

“You and your children are very lucky! I never realised your husband was so wealthy. 

The wife swiftly replies

“Was he heck, he was a bloomin window cleaner!”

Rainbow Children

George has been busy finding out facts about animals. 

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Answers to Quiz

Calendar Foods

Signs of the Zodiac

1st March St. David’s Day is Pisces the sign of the fish

4th July US Independence day is Cancer the sign of the crab

25th December Christmas Day is Capricorn the sign of the goat

31st October Halloween is Scorpio the sign of the Scorpion

Odd Words Out

[a] LEAGUE this can proceed TABLE all others can proceed CHAIR

[b]ROSE this can proceed GARDEN all the others can proceed HOUSE

[c]GLASS this can proceed CEILING all the others can proceed FLOOR

Towns/Cities 

  1. Beverley 
  2. Potters Bar
  3. Havant
  4. Ramsbottom
  5. Barking
  6. Newcastle
  7. Looe
  8. Sandwich
  9. Bangor
  10. Leeds
  11. Sale
  12. Ascot
  13. Marlow
  14. Fleet
  15. Bath
  16. Mansfield
  17. Exeter 
  18. Newquay
  19. Folkstone
  20. Derby
  21. Portland
  22. Staines
  23. Cambridge
  24. Ware
  25. Dover
  26. Rugby
  27. Margate
  28. Stockport
  29. Nuneaton
  30. Cowes
  31. Grimsby 
  32. Sheffield  
  33. Quizzes
  1. Somewhere
  1. What does UV stand for?
  2. Which Duke Ellington jazz standard has also been recorded by Annie Lennox and Nina Simone?
  3. Which boy band represented the UK in the 2011 Eurovision Song Contest?
  4. Which piece of music is believed to have been written by Henry VIII?
  5. In which US national park is Old Faithful?
  6. What do the bells of St. Clement say?
  7. Which horse won the Grand National in 1973, 1974 and 1977?

What might you find at the end of this ?

  1. Fill in the blanks

?was a rolling stone 

? beach

?California

?in the jar

? and?

Prayer for Pentecost

God of power

May the boldness of your Spirit

Transform us

May the gentleness of your Spirit

Lead us

May the gifts of your Spirit

Be our goal and strength

Now and always

Amen

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